Threatening Me With Being Arrested Isn't Effective

 

My dad called me Saturday night to let me know that a creditor called their residence in Seguin, Texas (where I have never officially lived). Dad wasn't there, so his wife Cindy answered, and this jackass informed her that he was with a law firm and needed to speak to John Rabon IMMEDIATELY. (My dad's name is John.)

 

He pressed her for a bit and then informed her that  he (I) owes $17,000 for a credit card, and that they were about to issue a warrant for his (my) arrest.

 

Okay, the guy on the phone was actually a phone monkey in a collection agency run out of a "law firm" that does strictly debt collecting. These guys are so good at what they do, they end up calling my dad in another city instead of my phone number that hasn't changed since I've been divorced.

 

A warrant for my arrest? Wow that's scary. I'd hate to end up in one of the many debtor's prisons we have all over America. Shit...I could become an indentured servant. Oh wait a second, it's not the 18th Century. You can't actually do that. Nice try, dipshit.

 

Threatening to have someone arrested may work on the ignorant and the clean cut, but I...am neither. I've been arrested before, pole choker...you can't scare a poor drunk with a record. You can't even find me.

 

And besides, I'm just following in the footsteps of our country's leaders. What about the national debt, huh? I figure, hey, what's good enough for America is good enough for Uncle Cranky.

 

I'll just pay for shit in cash.

 

 

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