Hey, The Most Voted For Online Ain't The Best

 

Hey, so there's this contest on Comedy Central called the "Stand-Up Showdown". This is where Comedy Central wanted all of you to pick the best stand-ups to end their "Stand-Up Comedy Month" and to premiere Dane Cook's HBO special. Yay to all of that.

 

Want to see the results? Check them out.

 

Want to know know what I think? Well, okay. I think it was more of a "who can promote themselves online to compensate for not being funny" contest. Actually I'm partially right. Places 5-20 are completely fine. Comedians who can make people laugh and have a solid fan base. I'm behind almost all of them. I, however, would like to focus on the top 4. The BEST!!!

 

1. Jeff Dunham - I bet he was great before his neck fat gave away his ventriloquism. I wrote a blog on this guy over a year ago when this aired: Read here

2. Josh Sneed - I know you're saying, "Who?" Keep that thought, mix it with all the worst parts of a frat guy, and everything you hate about predictable jokes. Oh, I forgot that he's been an asshole to several of my friends at Cap City Comedy Club. What does that equal? Someone who apparently can promote the shit out of himself without any goddamn quality whatsoever. Bottom line: Change the channel.

3. Lisa Landry - I've been in the comedy scene for a long time and have never heard of her. I saw the first 2 minutes of her special. She said she hated skinny girls...because she's a fatty. Awful. "F".

4. Frank Caliendo - He does voices...accurately. His stand-up is coming up with reasons to do the voices that he knows how to do. "Have you ever notice that President Bush sometimes makes a rare gesture that almost resembles this impression I've been doing for a while and need to do again?" Seriously? 4th...4th

 

Hey, anyone who reads this...if you voted for any of the top 4 who made it...I hope you get VD...and you don't realize it until it scars. Idiots.

 

My top 4?

 

1. Mitch Hedberg

2. Dave Attell

3. Doug Benson

4. Lewis Black

(4.5 Patton Oswalt)

 

And that's just by going on the videos we were voting on.

 

Holy christ, people, even Dane Cook's special was funny. It was actually the last time he was ever really funny! And you went with Lisa Landry?? What, do you like listening to fat blond chicks bore you for 20 minutes?

 

 

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