GET OVER YOURSELF, TEXAS!

My God, can't Texas let a guy's corpse get cold before it has to tear him down for being.... not from Texas? Jeff Salamon wrote an article for the Austin American-Stateman that was the most snively, pissant gob of ink waste that I've seen in quite while. The piece was in Friday's paper, and was titled "Fear And Loathing, Texas style -- Hunter S. Thompson and Texas Literary Outlaws Cut From Same Cloth". 'OK, fine', I thought. An article with Texas writers giving their thoughts and memories, paying homage to Hunter Thompson and how he influenced them. There's articles like that all over the place right now.

But, lo and behold, surprise of all surprises, a Texas publication had to toot the old yee-haw horn, and tell us once again how "If it ain't from Texas, it ain't worth squat on a rock." This article didn't honor Thompson at all -- it only served to demean him, explaining how Thomson didn't invent "gonzo journalism", that Texas writers were doing it first, and how they out-partied him when he came to town. In fact, the first line of the article reads: "If Hunter S. Thompson hadn't existed, Texas would have had to invent him. In fact, it sort of did."

Are you freaking kidding me?? I've lived in Austin for 10 years. I love this place, and I love this state. One of the things that attracted me here was the people's zealot-like pride for their state, very much (and even more so) like Tennessee, where I came from. And Texas deserves that pride -- it's history is the richest and most interesting there is, and it's people are unparalleled in their courage, fortitude, and character. Let me say again -- I love Texas with all my heart and soul. Now, that said... Texas, GET OVER YOURSELF!

In particular, Mr. Soloman and the Statesman -- you can't give a great artist, even a hero in your own profession, a few days of honor before you attempt to lessen him? Maybe it's that, since Texas is the self-proclaimed king of all things gritty and cool, it just couldn't stand to not own someone grittier and cooler than itself? I guess it's the Texan way these days, at the guidance of our infamous former governor: "If we can't own it -- we'll kill it!" If we can't claim Hunter Thomson as our own, and he didn't claim us, then I guess he's not as cool as y'all think. Right? OK, swell. My point is this: Right now, today, who cares? Maybe he was first, maybe he wasn't. Maybe he was the best and most badass, maybe he wasn't. Is it really something that couldn't wait longer than a week after the man's death? Guess not -- the honor of Texas is apparently at stake.

Rest of intelligent world: "Hunter S. Thompson was a literary God, and a giant of a man. Let's honor his memory.

Jeff Salamon: "But... but.. he wasn't from Texas! He can't be that cool. We... we had these guys, see? They did it too. And... and they were better, cuz... cuz, they's from TEXAS! Yee-haw!..."

Rest of intelligent world: "Hunter S. Thompson was a genius, a freak of nature, and a trailblazer. We love him for it, and we're in mourning that he's gone."

Jeff Salamon: "Nuh-uh. Yee-haw."

Thanks again, Jeff Salamon and The Austin American-Statesman, for speaking for the shallow, narrow-minded, insensitive moron in all of us.

Roger